Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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