i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
