on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize