My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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