I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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