she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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