i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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