i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Randomize
