So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Congratulations! We have a period
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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