So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Randomize
