you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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