dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I party with great urgency now.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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