You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize