Hey man sorry I got all grabby
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
