the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
