How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Alive.
So much puke
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
