can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Even my vagina gasped.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
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