Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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