He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
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