I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
Randomize
