is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Randomize
