My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
