Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Randomize
