I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
