i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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