I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Randomize
