I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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