I'm drive I can fine osifer
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize