Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I feel like abortions should bother me more
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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