at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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