I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Randomize
