He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Life is so much better after having sex.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
two words...techno handjob
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Randomize
