wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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