But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
We have started to decorate penises.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
