so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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