The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
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