I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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