Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Can I color on your dick again?
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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