I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
