just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
i dont even know how to be here
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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