I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
