You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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