someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
