Plan B is the new Plan A
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
