Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
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