It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Randomize