When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
