he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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