Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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