Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
