In the future we'll all be gay
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize
